I wrote these in a notepad file and promptly forgot them until I needed a first post for this blog. I can't explain why I felt all caps was the right choice, but here we are.
PERSONA 5 (7/10)
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THE OPPRESSIVE SYSTEMS REMAIN SO UNALTERABLE THAT THEY CAN NEVER TRULY BE OVERCOME, EVEN BY THE WILIEST THIEVES. WHILE LIBERATING THE CITY FROM A SEEMINGLY SMALL TIME MAFIOSO OR A CONFUSINGLY CORRUPT ARTIST/ ART DEALER THE QUEER AND FEMALE PEOPLE REMAIN RIGIDLY LOCKED IN THEIR PLACES OF SUBMISSION. DO NOT SHOW ME GAY MEN AS PREDATORY CARTOONS AND THEN TRY TO SELL ME THAT YOU'RE SOCIAL LIBERATORS. I FEEL FOR INDIVIDUALS. SHIHO AND ANN, ESPECIALLY DURING THE FIRST DUNGEON FELT MOSTLY REAL TO ME. BUT RYUJI IS THE ONLY HONEST THIEF, HE'S IN IT FOR THE FUN. COMBAT MECHANICS NIFTY.
THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: THE BREATH OF THE WILD (8/10)
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JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I HAVE A LONG HISTORY OF LOVING ZELDA. IT'S LOVABLE. ALTHOUGH I NEVER FELT LIKE I HAD SEEN THE "REAL" HYRULE UNTIL NOW. THE WORLD SHOWS RATHER THAN TELLS THE PLAYER THEY HAVE TRUE AGENCY CLIMBING THESE HILLS AND EXPLOITING THESE TOYS, PURE JOY IN EXPLORATION. BY HOUR THIRTY YOU REALIZE COMBING HYRULE WILL ONLY RESULT IN A HANDFUL OF DIFFERENT DISCOVERIES. THE CHARACTERIZATION OF THE HEROES IS ONLY IMPRESSIVE IN THE CONTEXT OF OTHER ZELDA GAMES WHICH HAVE NO EXPERIENCE IN ACTUAL CHARACTER ARCS. SHE LOOKS LESS LIKE PEACH NOW SO SHE'S NOT A DAMSEL?
MARIO KART 8 DELUXE (6/10)
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FAST (BUT NOT AS FAST AS YOU THINK) FLASHY (MORESO THAN YOU REMEMBER) MARIO KART IS A VEHICLE OF JOY, MORE OR LESS. I'M CONFOUNDED BY THE EMPHASIS ON RIDER AND VEHICLE STATS. I WANT TO MAKE MY BOYFRIEND SLIP ON A BANANA PEEL IN A HAUNTED MANSION, WHY AM I CAREFULLY COMPARING TIRES? ULTIMATELY MARIO KART IS A SATURDAY MORNING CARTOON I CAN PLAY, SO I'M GRATEFUL FOR IT. FEELS GOOD TO GET ANOTHER USE OUT OF MY THREE HUNDRED DOLLAR PORTABLE ZELDA MACHINE. BUT STILL, IT MAKES ME THINK TOO MUCH, AND AT THE SAME TIME, NOT ENOUGH.
SNIPPERCLIPS (4/10)
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SNIPPERCLIPS MAKES ME WONDER WHAT IT'S LIKE TO PITCH AN INDIE GAME TO NINTENDO. HOW MUCH OF THE FAT DO THEY TRIM? IT IS SO STERILE, AND SO SOLITARY IN THE GAME LINE-UP. ASIDE FROM 1-2-SWITCH IT'S THE ONLY THING AT THE SYSTEM'S LAUNCH DOING THE SWITCH "THING," BREAKING OFF A CONTROLLER AND HANDING IT OVER TO A FRIEND. THE GAME ENDS JUST WHEN YOU AND YOUR PATIENT PARTNER FEEL LIKE THE TUTORIAL IS OVER. I'M INTERESTED IN THESE MECHANICS AND HAD SOME LAUGHS, BUT WE'RE NOT FINISHED EXPLORING ALL THE THINGS WE CAN DO. WHY CUT IT SO SHORT?
KENTUCKY ROUTE ZERO (6/10)
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KENTUCKY ROUTE ZERO TOOK ME BACK TO THE WEIRDNESS OF GROWING UP IN THE RURAL SOUTH. THE DREAMY LANDSCAPE AND DARK MYSTERIES ARE UTTERLY APPEALING, BUT ALL THINGS IN MODERATION. WITH EACH SPECTACLE OF SHADOW WE'RE BROUGHT FURTHER AND FURTHER FORM THE WORLD WE KNOW AND UNFORTUNATELY FURTHER AND FURTHER FROM COHERENCY. AT LEAST, THE MINIMUM LEVEL OF COHERENCY REQUIRED TO MAINTAIN MY FOCUS. EVERY NEW SCENE IS A WONDER WHICH I WHOLEHEARTEDLY LOVED BUT WHICH I COULDN'T TOTALLY CONNECT TO, AS IT INTENTIONALLY DISCONNECTS ITSELF FROM SCENES PROCEEDING. EXCELLENT BEDTIME STORY. THE ONLY GAME I'VE FALLEN ASLEEP TO TWICE.
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